Feminists destroy dating site
Fiona, It doesn’t matter how many men think like this. But I would be remiss if I didn’t pull out the nugget of wisdom from the flawed logic of the laundry operator.
I said I would be unlikely to go again because I have nothing in common to talk about with the men that I have met at these events.
He proceeded to give me a lecture as to why I shouldn’t automatically dismiss dating the two guys who were responsible for service washes in the launderette as they may be perfectly nice people and that career women in their thirties get what they deserve if they don’t.
Why he was there, I do not know, as he made it clear that he was not really looking to date anyone.
He did however buy me a drink in the bar afterwards and asked me what I thought of the event.
My answer to you is largely the same as my answer to her. If you don’t go out with him because you intimate that you’re “above” him on the dating food chain, it’s predictable that he might lash out at you. It’s not that he’s a few pounds overweight, it’s that he’s obese. Your choice of words, however, makes you come like a stiff snob.
You may be technically correct that he’s not of your social station, but that’s of no concern to the man you’ve just insulted to his face. All of your examples are extreme, but not all men are extreme examples of anything. What I am saying – and what these men are inartfully suggesting as well – is that you don’t marry a list of traits. And if you never think outside the box, you may well find yourself standing alone at the end of the dance. Being viewed (judged) like that is the reason why many men will not even go near a woman who earns even a little bit more than he does.
In the comments section of the last disaster of a social justice post on my blog, someone started talking about how much they hated the term “mansplaining”, and someone else popped in to – ironically – explain what “mansplaining” was and why it was a valuable concept that couldn’t be dismissed so easily. At this point I jumped in and commented: I feel like every single term in social justice terminology has a totally unobjectionable and obviously important meaning – and then is actually used a completely different way.
A sinking feeling tells me it probably isn’t that easy.
Literally, the ONLY thing he can do when you tell him that you have nothing in common (without getting to know him) is tell you that you’re wrong for judging people and that this attitude may come back to haunt you. So, to be crystal clear: no one (besides the fat, stupid and elderly) is saying that you have to date the fat, stupid, or elderly. The reason that I call this a blind spot for women is because women tend to adhere more to their checklists, which usually call for a man who is just like you, but better.
The closest analogy I can think of is those religious people who say “God is just another word for the order and beauty in the Universe” – and then later pray to God to smite their enemies.
If an enemy approached, you would retreat to the motte and rain down arrows on the enemy until they gave up and went away.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating